The fluid motion of my Gender
by AAThanatos
Summary: Nico with the help of Piper discovers that maybe his gender isn't all as simple as he thought. The idea of being genderfluid sparks something deep within him that he never knew. When Will gets back from New Rome Nico discovers that Will is sparked by it too. Smut/ possible series of you guys like it. Don't like don't read don't hate. Nico is genderfluid and Piper is Trans.


**This story does contain smut. If you don't like that then don't read. Don't like don't read don't hate. This is a story line that came to me suddenly and if younenjoy this please review and let me know and I'll try to make it it's own multichapter story.**

 **Discovering my fluid nature**

I was spending a lot of time alone. Will was in New Rome at a seminar for the last month and both of us were unsure when he was going to return. I missed him. I missed him enough that I couldn't bring myself to be around a lot of people, made me miss him to much. Will was the one I wanted to talk to. The thing about spending time alone was that your mind begins to wander and you start to think of things you hadn't before. Well it's not like I had never thought about it I had just never really given it any real thought. Piper was the one who noticed first. My eyes lingering on her blouse, she assumed I was checking out her chest but then in a split second realized it wasn't her breasts that interested me as much as the beading on the fabric.

Piper was the only one I talked to this month when I did interact. She would come over once a week to make sure I wasn't dead or dying on the floor. Questions started to pop into my mind and soon out of my mouth when she was around.

"Why do you wear make up?" I asked her as I held my coffee close to my chin, taking in the waft of waking up.

"Because it makes me feel confident I guess. Why?" Sitting up straighter she sat her mug down to give me her full attention.

"Is it weird that I'm curious about trying it?"

"I don't think it's weird. Are you thinking like drag?"

I laughed at the word. Drag. That would imply I want to perform for strangers in a weird character that made fun of unknowing strangers while lip syncing one of those gruesome songs Will subjects me to in the car.

"No, like everyday. Light makeup?"

"Did you want to try out girls clothes too?"

"Yes, I'm curious I guess. I don't know. I've just never really felt completely male. I'm not attracted to women but I love women, does that make sense?" I sip my coffee as she takes in my words. Avoiding her eyes I see her shift in her seat as her gears turn inside her head. She had feathers in her hair today, I want to try that.

"Well Nico, I guess my question is do you feel like you should be a woman and you are trapped in a mans body or does it change throughout the day? Or even day to day." Her hand reached out and gripped my wrist, a motion that showed she cares about my answer. That she really wanted to help me with this.

"I would say day to day or even moment to moment. I've read up on some stuff since Will has been gone. He has been keeping journals about transgendered people and multiple sexualities and genders. He wants to be informed and a safe doctor they can go to without judgement. Pollux came to him when a doctor turned him away for being Trans and asked him embarrassing questions just to make fun of him. Ever since Will has made it his mission to be that doctor people in the LGBTQ can go to without shame. That's why he's been gone so long, classes and lectures on the newest surgeries and sexual identity." I slid my hand to grip hers, emotion built in my throat and made it thick and hard to swallow. I was so proud of him.

"That Nico is amazing. I want to tell you something, something Only Jason knows. I'm transgender."

Her admission shocked me, I would never had known. Piper was so beautiful and probably the most feminine looking of all my girlfriends.

"When did you know?"

"I was 11. Luckily my dad got me to a Doctor instead of passing it off as a phase. I started hormones very very early. When I was 15 my dad found a doctor that was willing to shave my trachea, not that it was very big anyway because of my hormones. Then when I turned 21 I went on my journey of completing my transition. "

"Jason, when did you tell him?"

"After the war. When we started getting to the point of being actually physical. I was really lucky. It didn't matter to him. Jason loved me not my body. You know how I was when I was 16. I didn't like the idea of being pretty, that was because I was still figuring everything out. I knew I was female but I didn't want to be a top model bimbo. I was still fighting my sexuality and gender inside. That's why I didn't have my surgeries until I was 21."

I laughed "I thought you just wanted a boob job!"

"Everyone thought that! Well to be fair the hormones gave me small breasts and I started them so young that I passed. I wanted bigger ones so I guess you could say I wanted a boob job."

"Did you and Jason have sex? Like pre op?"

"If it wasn't you I would punch you for that question. But luckily I know that you are curious for the sake of being curious and not because you are trying to make fun of me or Jason. Plus you are my best guy friend. Yes, we had sex pretty quickly actually. Maybe because he was so ok with it. Jason never saw me as male, even after he saw my penis. Never even made a difference. Jason loves me for me. Even told me that I didn't have to change. Wanna know a dirty secret?"

"Yes! Of course I do, who are you talking to?" I giggled setting my coffee down infront of me. Pipers eyes lit up. I had a feeling she didn't have anyone except Jason to talk to about this. I was glad she trusted me enough.

"Jason misses my dick. Sure he loves my new equipment but... he misses it. The boy gives one hell of a blow job."

I couldn't believe my ears. A swell of tender emotion ripped inside my chest for Jason. Jason Grace has sucked a dick, and misses it.

"Is jason...bisexual?"

"No, in fact if he knows you know he will tell you he's Pipersexual. It doesn't matter what's between my legs, just between my ears." Throwing her long choppy hair back she ran her perfectly done nails along her scalp to fluff her coif.

"So what does that make me?"

Thought crossed her face. Like she was looking for the right word.

"If I had to guess, I would say that maybe you are gender fluid. But then again only you can say."

Genderfluid. I like the sound of that. It made me feel warm inside like something had been unlocked. That's it, I'm genderfluid. I feel different both moment to moment and day to day. It moves, changes, morphs. Takes shape from mood to mood.

"That sounds accurate if I had to put a label on it. What does that mean though? Like how would I even... I don't know what I'm saying." I took a cigarette out and lit it at the table. Pulling the ashtray to me from the middle of the table, Piper reached out to bum one. Lifting my lighter to her lips she took a long drag before she answered.

"Well we could play with some make up? Do your hair? Try on some clothes? Jewelry? Anyway you feel you want to express that part of you I guess."

I let her words sink in as I pulled hard from the cylinder between my lips. Hmmm makeup. Maybe a dress? Earrings? They were pierced, I guess I could get something a little flashier. It was something to think about.

break

This last month had been eye opening. Piper had taken me shopping, she had taught me how to apply make up and open my color pallet... well somewhat. I still loved my black on black. Yet now I was trying things like pencil skirts and yoga pants. Painting my nails on my more femme days. Learning to accessorize, wearing the glory of women's underwear. Damn I loved women's underwear. There was so much more to choose from and it was comfortable and silky. Made me feel sexy in this way I could never achieve other wise. Men's underwear never made you feel that way, it was more like a fig leaf to cover your cock.

I liked rings. I had always had my skull ring but now I was pairing it with different types of jewels and metals. Diamonds glittered my ears almost daily.

It was late and I was trying on this new piece of women's lingerie I had bought for bedtime. It was tight but stretched with my body. Black lace body stocking is what the box said. It has sleeves and clinged to my body. Beautiful flowers interlaces in the mesh and comes down like a skin tight dress just below my ass. My hair was getting longer and I flipped it around a bit to feel the movement. Piper had taught me to straighten it and blow dry it, it reached just below my chin in a razor cut. I hadn't removed my make up for the night yet. Subtle pink eyeshadow that wasn't to bright. Eyeliner and mascara. A bit of bronzer on my cheeks.

I felt my body through the lace. I felt so sexy in this, but Will would be back soon. I still hadn't told him of my revelation. What if he didn't like it? What if he thought I was weird? I don't know how I would handle something like that. Would he leave me? These questions plagued me every time I tried these clothes on. It also felt natural and euphoric. I knew from the first time Piper made me try on the pencil skirt that there was no going back. This was me. It was who I was meant to be, the piece that was missing. I was so caught up in my thoughts while looking at the stocking in the mirror that I didn't hear Will come in the apartment. I only noticed him when I saw his reflection in the mirror with me.

Wills eyes darkened. They became focused as he studied what he was seeing. Fear gripped me. This isn't how I wanted to tell him. Not like this. I wanted to ease him into it. Sit him down and talk about what Piper and I had discussed this last month.

"We talked on the phone every day. How come this never came up?" Walking behind me he gripped my waist and put his forehead on my neck. His voice didn't sound angry, just puzzled. I missed his voice. The feel of his hands on me, and now they were touching me with the lace which was all to distracting.

"I didn't know how to say it. Are you mad?" My words didn't stutter but they shook.

"Not mad. Confused. What is this? I've spent a month pretty much studying yet I didn't expect this. Kind of makes me feel like I missed something.

"You didn't miss anything. This is new. Something that's been hidden even from me for a long time." Hands moved to cross infront of my waist and lips brushed my neck.

"So, What is it? It's ok whatever it is but I'd like to know so I can make you comfortable. "

What is it? Will was such a man. A bisexual man but still a man. You would think he would have had a smoother way of asking. I couldn't help but chuckle at the brunt ness of his sentence.

"I'm genderfluid."

"Ahhh I learned about that. So this is more of a changing from day to day thing."

"Yeah" I breathed at his understanding.

"Well if it helps I'm willing to do whatever you need. If you want me to use different pronouns or a different name..."

"Well, I wouldn't mind being called she from time to time. I'll keep my name though. " I smiled down feeling my back against his front. Pressing into the warmth I've missed for so long.

"So if I called you baby girl when I see you in a sexy as Fuck piece like what you are wearing right now... that would be ok?" The words made my knees weak and my body shake. The sound of him calling me baby girl, the feel of him responding well to my underwear, I melted. Fingers snatched at the clingy fabric, a mouth found my earlobe. Fuck!

"Are you wearing anything under this?" He whispered.

"A black G-string." At the word string I felt the bulge in his pants press into my backside.

"Tell me you want me, tell me your a dirty girl that wants me to make love to you while you wear this" biting the cuff of my ear my breath hitches in the back of my throat.

"I'm a dirty girl, I want you to make love to me."

"That's a good girl."

Turning me around I felt him invade my mouth. Will was responding to this better than I had hoped. He didn't just accept this, it turned him on! Heat radiated throughout my body as I felt the burn of lust rip inside me. Gods I missed this, yet now that I think about it I had never experienced it. Of course we had had sex before, in almost every way possible. We started soon after we began to date, but we hadn't done this. We hadn't had sex with both of us knowing I was female right now. It was exhilarating. Just hearing him affirm my gender while touching me just made it more. Just more.

Dancing us to the bed he laid me down gently. Wandering hands roamed the stocking until they reached my thighs, and that's when he noticed.

"You shaved your legs." The purr of his voice pulled at my abdomen.

"Yes" I breathed looking down at him kneeling between my knees, running his hands on my hairless legs. Taking in all the new textures that had never been in our love making.

"You look so fucking beautiful. I'm sorry I don't tell you that enough. I didn't expect this when I came home but damn baby... I love this. I really love this." Feeling my legs with his face I felt the scruff of his stubble rub my hairless skin, as if he couldn't feel it properly without using his face.

"I feel beautiful right now, I feel sexy."

"You are sexy, you are sexy and beautiful and mine!" Pulling me to the edge of the bed he threw my legs over his shoulders. Teeth dug into my inner thighs, creating purple flowers that blossomed on my alabaster skin. Flowers that I would carry with me all week to remind me he was here. Will liked marking me, loved claiming what was his. I loved carrying them.

A hot wet mouth worked over the silk of my panties. The sight of his head under the skirt of my stocking was making me unbearably hard. Fingernails scratched down my outer thighs, causing me to arch my back in pleasure. Damn sex between us hadn't been this hot since we were 16. Like most couples we had fallen into a slight routine, this was not in the script of our usual encounters. This was hot. So fucking hot, and oh so needed.

A tongue found its way under the silk fabric, my knees shook on his shoulders. Pulling the panties to the side with his teeth I felt him mouth at my balls. Taking each of them slowly and giving individual attention. I had shaved them too, it was worth it. The feel of me in his mouth with the lack of hair was so amazing, new even. I pawed at my own body trying to except the foreign sensation. I moaned wantonly at his ministrations. Humming into my apex as his tongue swirled wickedly against the tender skin.

"I... I... I want you so badly! Will!" I didn't even recognize my own voice. I don't think I had ever sounded so desperate. My voice higher than usual with a thick lust laced in the tone. It did something to him because moment later he was on top of me. Wordlessly I grabbed for our lube and placed it in his hand.

"Oh does my girl want me to finger her?"

Fuck! That sentence! Yes!

"Please! Finger me please!"

We never said things like this. We didn't narrate what we were about to do. Never. I liked it though, this affirming my gender in the bedroom. It made me feel both accepted and beautiful. Will never left my face, eyes bored into mine as he gently worked me open. All I could see was his hand working under my dress. Whining in a needy way he added more fingers and tasted my wanting by absorbing my cries with his mouth.

Slipping his zipper down I reached into his fly and felt at his neglected dick. The slick of his arousal was so much that it had dripped down, coating the length all the way to his balls. I teased his tip with my thumb over the slit. That got his attention and we weren't kissing as much as breathing into the others mouth. Three fingers were deep inside me as they grazed over the sweet spot inside me. The zing of pleasure rocked my core and shot up my body.

"Will! I.. I need... please!"

"Doesn't my girl want me inside her?"

"Gods yes! Now!"

I pulled my hand front his pants, fingers wet from him. As he undressed I licked it from my finger tips obscenely.

"Oh you dirty girl you."

I reached for my dress to remove it but he stopped me, he wanted to do this with it on. Reaching up he pulled the panties off entirely and threw them across the room. Slicking up his cock I looked down to see how heavy and swollen it had become. I had never seen or felt Will that hard before, hiking up my skirt he pushed inside of me. Gods I missed this. The stretch, the feeling of fullness.

No toy could ever replace the warm feeling of Will. Wrapping my legs around his waist he lowered himself to set a slow agonizing pace. Almost to slow but not quite. Making me feel every inch creep up inside me. Deliberately hitting that spot I so craved. Encircling his neck with my arms I held him close as he took me. With every thrust I pulled him tighter to me, embedding the lace patterns into both our bodies. It didn't take long, we were so riled up and also built up from not seeing eachother. I felt him cum first. Quivering above me with my name drawn out filling the air around us.

"Turn over, all fours."

I did as I was told as he pulled out of me. I could feel his arousal drip out of me at my movement. Pulling my skirt up to my lower back he quickly latched himself to the wrinkled entrance that he had just invaded. Reaching around he pulled at my foreskin in a gentle rhythm. The feeling of him tonguing at me had me screaming into the mattress. A string of Italian filth left my mouth as the memory of all English had escaped me. Will and I were a pretty vanilla couple when it came to sex, not really going outside the box of "normal" sex. The idea that he was rimming me after he had just finished was way outside of our comfort zone. I loved it! It was the sexiest fucking thing he had ever done.

I came with a cry that I'm sure the neighbors did not appreciate and I would deny later to them when they asked, they were defiantly going to ask that's how loud it was. I drenched his hand and the sheets below as I convulsed in bliss and overwhelming sensitivity. Once he let go I collapsed. Crawling back up next to me I felt his mouth meet mine. My eyes were closed so it surprised me. Both of us still breathing hard from the best sex we had had in years.

"Will, I love you so much." I said between light little kisses.

"I love you too. So, you wanna tell me about what happened this month?"

"Only if you tell me what happened with yours first. "

"Deal."

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